Wednesday, September 20, 2006

He does exist!

Picselated just dropped by while doing a bit of research, and encountered one of our crazy repeat patrons. He tried to help her with a copy card reader and then told her about the temperature in Periodicals.

"Which one is he?" she whispered conspiratorily to me, and I had only one reply: "That is the Assburger."

He's like the Yeti. Until recently only Silenus and I had encountered him, and we've been regarded with great skepticism when we recount those tales, almost as though we were showing grainy footage of a guy strolling through the stacks in a big furry suit with a zipper down his back. Eskimo saw the Assburger yesterday for the first time, but her sighting has not been confirmed. I took down her account and think it's likely a Close Encounter, but need more evidence before making a determination.

Soon I'll be confined in my own little office in a secure building, safely ensconced and protected from dealings with any form of the public. No more loonies, no more herd.


Tracy said...

he does exist!
does he typically try to help out patrons? wtf!

Silenus said...

Eskimo's encounter has been confrimed. "He kept interjecting with all these wierd comments whenever I tried to help a patron." Definitely Assburger. I still need to get that adapter for my phone so you can post an actual picture that beast.

geoff said...

He likes to 'help' young female patrons!

We could send that photo of Assburger in the trashbag to the Fortean Times.