Friday, May 27, 2005

Insomnia

During the school year I work Sundays 11-8 and Monday thru Thursday from 1pm until 10pm. Yes, it sucks.

Now that the summer is here I work the same Mon-Thurs schedule, but I have to come in Fridays early because we're not open late on Fridays and we're closed Sundays. Yes, this is better, but it still sucks. I left work at 10:05pm last night and was back here at 7:30am this morning.

And, as if by design, I had insomnia for the first time in two months last night. In bed by 11:30, I actually fell asleep shortly before 1am, only to wake up 20 minutes later, and then I remained awake until 5am.

I hate all the varieties of insomnia, but my least favorite is The Tease, when I fall asleep perfectly and for some unknown reason wake up almost immediately and find myself unable to get back to where I was, like a diving bell with a ballast problem blasting back to the surface too quickly. Suffering lockjaw and REM decompression, I lie in bed too tired to read or think but mysteriously incapable of dozing, my eyes dry, my muscles zapped, my mind whirling away on a dozen simultaneous annoying riffs. Knowing I've got a limited amount of time to get much-needed sleep before heading back to work intensifies the buzzing absurdity of sleep slithering just out of reach, mocking me, playing the unattainable coquette. She's seduced me, I'm hers, but no! Ever fickle, sleep cavorts with others in a playful gangbang and I'm outside the club beyond the velvet ropes, my name not on the list.

As a result, I'm more goofy than usual today, playing air guitar at my desk, unable to concentrate on call numbers and cataloging, easily distracted by Bolton's ridiculous moustachios.

I should, I suppose, be grateful to have had two months without what has been a much more common curse in the past [knocks wood].