Monday, May 23, 2005

Don't believe the hype...

Yes, it's getting good reviews, but Star Wars Episode III is stupendously insipid. Is it as bad as Episode II or Episode I? No, but Herbie the Love Bug (the original) was better than those installments, as was the first porno I ever saw, Erotic City. In fact, Erotic City had a better script than any of the three recent Star Wars films, and the dialogue was far superior; in fact, Joey Silvera, Harry Reems and Amber Lynn are much better actors than Hayden Christensen and Natalie Portman and even Ewan McGregor in this adolescent mishmash. Episode III is pornography, for those who get off on slick visual effects, for those who delight in absence of character or plot, for those perpetually 13.

I hated this movie, and could waste time telling you why, but I have more important things to attend to. I'll let Anthony Lane tell it like it is:

The general opinion of Revenge of the Sith seems to be that it marks a distinct improvement on the last two episodes, The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones. True, but only in the same way that dying from natural causes is preferable to crucifixion.