It astonishes me anew every Spring. As soon as we get a couple sunny days, the campus seems overrun by beach models/Hooters waitresses who are immediately tan, sporting half-shirts and low-rider pants that display either thong or an inch or two of exposed asscrack. I've written here before that I'm not a fan of thongs poking out of jeans; I wondered if this were due to some sudden curmudgeony conservatism, but no, I think it's because I'm much more a fan of the surreptitious glimpse of delicious female flesh. When everything is on display I don't get the pleasure of seeing something secret and surprising, and therefore all fun and mystery is drained out of the experience. I just walked across the main floor of the Liberry from the Tech Services office to the lobby, and no lie I saw 75% of a fantastic teenaged ass, perched on a stool at a PC, the owner of said ass leaned forward and instant messager-ing frantically whilst twirling an abundance of light brown hair around her finger. An entire mob of young fratters was chewing straws, pens, pencils, and knuckles, gathering around the Reference stax and pretending to browse dictionaries while in actuality browsing grand pink fleshy globes. Continuing to the lobby I counted no less than six additional exposed asscracks (these not as severe as the other but still vivid).
There are many situations for which we have no etiquette: what does one do upon meeting a new co-worker and seeing there's a booger hanging out of the poor sot's nose? Emily Post offers no hope. Four years ago I took it upon myself to tell a young woman that I could see her ass and thong in class, thinking I was offering aid in a potentially embarrassing situation. Her response? "Well, duh, it's supposed to be like that." So today when I saw the young brunette with nearly her entire ass hanging out and half the male population of Towson drooling behind her, I did nothing except look myself and keep walking. Maybe it is supposed to be like that.
I used to tell my students that whenever older people gave them a hard time about their generation's taste or work habits that it was probably out of jealousy. Grandad complains that kids today have no work ethic? He's jealous that he had no DVD player, PC, iPod, stereo of his own as a youngster. Grandma says kids today are dumb and got no sense? She wishes she'd been able to party and download porn instead of having to sit through 6 hours of church a week. Perhaps my objection to the current ass-baring fashion is based in the fact I'm out of the game and married ten years and my college library never looked like the lounge at Gentleman's Gold Club.
